This isn’t going to be a purely tech-focused entry, but the first part of what’s likely to be a series. It’s more of an out-loud guide for myself and possibly for the benefit of others.
I’m one of very few people I know of whose spouse and I both had living parents, still married, at the start of 2024. The other is a sibling, or was in this case, as 2024 was a tough year for parents in the family. It’s not that we didn’t see this coming, because it is mortality in the simplest terms, but two of these losses were brutal. Needless to say that, in early 2025, that first statement can no longer be said.
For my brother’s family I was able to rescue data from a mobile phone and PC, then transfer multiple Video 8 tapes to a digital video format and share them more broadly. This is something that I enjoy doing, because a tape is a great place for a backup, not the original copy. Those videos and photos and files are shared and accessible to the family, while the digital devices have been sanitized and moved on to new owners.
For my spouse’s family’s needs, it was a little bit easier as the change and passing wasn’t as fast. We were able to, as a family, make decisions and get the proper settings changed in order to make sure that data and access was not lost. This side of the family uses iOS and macOS exclusively, and those platforms along with iCloud have features like Legacy Contacts that enable access to data if there’s ever an occasion that immediate access is lost. This was easy, and included two of the siblings in the family. We also did something similar with the Google account they used, to ensure that access to the iCloud’s email address was secure. This is important because so many necessary services like internet, banking, utilities, and other household needs are attached to email addresses and phone numbers.
2FA is a good, or great thing, but boy can it be tricky when you want to do simple things sometimes. For example. I was trying to enable a feature in iOS but there was an old iPad mini on the account. This device was using iOS 12, which didn’t support the feature, so it had to be removed from the iCloud account before it could be enabled, which is a bit strange, but understandable. However, when I tried to remove this device, I was unable to use the passcode. After several tries I had to add my face to the device and only then was I successful. Very odd, and possibly controversial, but for other reasons that I won’t go into here.
With all of this set up, we also decided to change the phone passcode. It had been left in the hospital with the person, and family members, but there was an incident where data was removed from the phone. Yes, it was a conversation with another family member, and all data was removed from the conversation. I consider this a violation of trust, as only one side of the conversation is truly private. This prompted us to change the phone’s passcode and not share it, which then caused some controversy. Be prepared for this, but also have just cause.
Along the same lines we did change the password for the computer in the house, which only had a password to keep younger grandchildren from installing programs on it unattended. I can’t say that this has had any controversy related to it, but suffice it to say that the sole person whose issue it was with this can probably assume that one step was too far.
The next steps have been slower and more deliberate. We now have the Apple and Google and internet provider’s logins and passwords saved on the legacy device and that of the still living spouse. As of iOS 18 and macOS 15 there’s a new Passwords app available. It’s very good at the 90th percentile of what any user would need in one app, and we’re putting this to use by making sure that the login data is stored on iCloud and is now shared between accounts and with other family members. One interesting feature I found only last night is that you can set up a passkey in a shared folder on another account. Neat.
I highly recommend using Passwords, even if you’re used to LastPass, 1Password, or other apps. I’ve been very satisfied with the transparency it’s enabled, especially in regards to what was a massive number of wireless access networks I’d connected to in the last 15 years. I must have deleted over 100 networks that I’d long forgotten about. This is wise because there are MITM attacks using devices like the WiFi Pineapple that can be very harmful with these devices and their willingness to connect to anything that looks familiar.
The Passwords sharing feature is something that we’re just starting to use. It does encourage Family Sharing, where you can share passwords with all members of the Shared iCloud storage. We opted to not do this, but to be more specific with the iCloud users and passwords to share. So far it’s working well, and we’ll be making changes to which passwords are shared and the accounts that have access to them. I quite frankly feel much better about using this as a method of password sharing versus a standalone app because many companies you know of also have been in the news for the wrong reasons. Share wisely.
Part two is likely going to deal with what you do when a family member passes and you want to maintain their accounts and communication, but their spouse isn’t even as technical as they are. It’s going to be interesting.